The Right Time to “Come Out”

There is no one else on the face of the planet that can tell you when the right time to come out of the closet is for you. We all work on our own timelines and have our own issues to work out before telling those around us that we’re gay. For some people that time never does come and they live their entire lives hiding their true selves from the world.

It is safe to say that a large part of this is the fact that parents and siblings not to mention bosses and coworkers are not always as understanding as one would like them to be. Oftentimes people are discriminated against due to their sexual orientation and while it may not be right, it is a fact that gays and lesbians have to deal with.

All that aside coming out is one of the most liberating and important things that you may ever do. To determine if you should tell anyone you first need to ask yourself some questions.

For example:

Who needs to know the truth about you being gay or lesbian?

It is best to start with those that you feel this information has the most affect on and who you feel the needs to be truthful with. Is there someone that you want to be able to talk to? Maybe a friend or family member who you would love to chat about your love life with? That kind of freedom is something worth considering, it can even bring you and that person closer together in friendship.

You may also want to start with the people you feel will accept you and not reject you when you come out. These people can be instrumental in helping you face the others in your life. Support like that is priceless, especially in such emotionally fraught situations.

Are you dating?

If you are currently dating someone and the relationship is getting more serious it can be hard to lie to the rest of the people in your life about it. Perhaps you want to take the relationship to the next level and move in together but you can’t because you are constantly worrying about other people wondering what the “true” situation between you is. This kind of stress can put a severe damper on any relationship and it is a fact that many a gay or lesbian relationship has died because one partner is not willing to come out to the rest of their friends and family members.

Is the fear and stress worth it?

No matter how bad you fear your family will take the news that you are gay or lesbian, is it worth it to hide this way forever. Think about the ways in which your covering up and lying has affected these relationships and the others in your life. Perhaps it would be easier for you to face the truth and have your family face it than to be scared of them finding out some other way down the road.

There are many things for you to consider when it comes to whether or not you are ready to come out and tell the world about being gay or lesbian and these are just the tip of the iceberg. Take your time, there is no rush, do it when you are ready and when you feel it is the right time for you.